On my mind

I have a problem. In July it's my birthday and I will turn 20 years old, still, I haven't got a clue what to do with my life. The only comfort I get is my own persuading that I'm still young enough to not get stressed out about my future. I see hopeful young people every day that have taken a leap and gone for their dream, and I wonder at what moment they knew. When will I know what is the right path for me and what if I never find the answer? Will I be a person who just dwell around all my life and feel no purpose and only long for something better to come along?

The strange thing is, I have lots of dreams. I want to be an interior designer, a project manager, a physiotherapist, a coach, a baker and so on. I have all the prospects in the world to achieve one of these dreams but first I have to choose. Then there are the dreams about travelling round the world, but to be able to do that you have to earn money first. Everything is just very confusing. If I want to do both, in which order should I start? The problem today, with the economic crisis and all, is that it's extremely hard to get a good job with or without an education. But of course, the ones with the education have a slight advantage, so maybe it is for the best to go back to school first. This takes me back to the problem of what to choose for a possible career, it can be an essential decisions for your future.

I'm absolutely not going to choose an education just because I know that I can earn lots of money when I'm done, of course that's a plus, but I want to do something I'll really enjoy doing. As I reflect over my thoughts, I realize that I will never ever be completely confident that the decision I make in the end, will be the right one. I will have to take a chance that my instinct at the moment is good enough, and I guess that is how my entire life is going to be. To be able to live life to the edge, you have to make some dared decisions, or else you won't live at all.

If I got a wish that would make it possible for me to foreordain my future, my wish would be to have a life full of happiness and experiences. I would want to travel and see interesting places, I would like to have a job where both duties and colleges agree with my interests, I would like to share many joyful moments with my friends, I would like to start a family with a person I really love and I would like to be able to die in peace. I know I can't get all these things, or maybe I can? It isn't that out of reach if you think about it.

What my future have in hold is yet to be discovered, but my own attitude to life and its setbacks may very well be the most crucial influence to the result. So, I will try to take some chances to move forward in life, and if I have no success in my first try, I will keep my courage to make the next decision. That is the only way to really live.